What are you up to, God?
God works in mysterious ways.
His ways are better than our own.
God knew that was going to happen, He wasn’t surprised. You should find comfort in that.
He sees the big picture.
We don’t have to understand, we just need to trust Him.
Does any of this sound familiar to you? I’ve caught myself saying, and hearing these exact phrases a lot these last few months. I know we don’t always understand God. His timing. His will. His purpose… This particular topic is always close to my heart, as I feel that God is constantly at work in my life. My marriage. My relationships. My “job” as a SAHM. My ministry. Every part of my being is intricately woven with Him at the center. At least that is my hope. My prayer. It is what I strive for, although I do falter at times.
Times when I was so sure that we were doing what He wanted us to do. But we didn’t get the outcome we expected, or desired. They say hindsight is 20/20. I know that looking back at some situations, I can see how God’s hand was gently guiding us, and even protecting us.
But what do you do when you are in the center of what seems like total chaos and confusion? When things look blurry in front, and in the back. We pray of course. But sometimes we grow weary too.We claim scriptures like Jeremiah 29:11 – “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ” and Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” But when you are deeply seeking God’s will and direction for you, and your family… When you are truly at a loss as to what He is calling you to do… When you are hurt, and confused, and angry even. When instead of our vision being 20/20 it is clouded in red? God knows our heart, so don’t try to hide your true feelings. I get mad all the time. He knows it, so I am honest about it with Him. I pray and He hears. I do not doubt that.
Perhaps I am too busy dwelling in the what-could-have-should-have-would-have beens and not listening to the will of my Father. Perhaps I need to remember to “Be still and know that [He] is God” and I am not. I also need to remember that I am not the Holy Spirit, and I need to step back and let Him do His job…
Sorry, I’m running off on a rabbit trail. I do that a lot.
My point to this is that I feel a stirring in my soul. I know that God is up to something big. B-I-G. I catch glimpses of it. But it seems as though the timing just isn’t right… yet. And I’m not exactly sure what God has in store. I know it will be amazing, and my goal is to be used for His glory.
So for now that is my prayer – Use me God. Show me your will. Help me to hold on to you, when what I really want to do is rush in and take things into my own hands. Help me let it go, and trust in You. As for the decisions that need to be made… Lord please guide us. Keep us in line with Your will, not our own selfish desires. Help us not to make rash, rushed decisions, but to prayerfully seek You and Your will in all we say and do. I just want to be used for Your glory. To further Your kingdom. Help me, when my nature is to just step back from it all… From prayer, from Your Word, from You. It is in these times that I need to cling to you, not run from you. Help me hold fast to Your promises, that You love me and care for me. That You are in control.